First published: 4-9-12 at 10:27 PM EDT
I have a friend who has a little sister also. A while ago, we had the following exchange:
Me:
Your sister is freaking adorable. Be a good influence :)
Him:So I taught her how to open a safe without getting caught today.
And she almost has the word "[expletive]" down.
I'm so proud of her.
He said this as sarcastically as he could in an IM (at least, I'd hope it was sarcasm), but this reminded me of an issue that should have some light shone on it. How much can you do around a babbling, wordless younger sibling without being a bad influence? And how much does what you do really influence your sibling at all?
When I understood absolutely nothing about how life and the world worked, even less than I do now, I looked up to my parents. I watched them, observed, asked questions, learned, picked things up subconsciously, etc. As parents, they had the ability to pretty much control everything I did and all the habits I have now. Between always remembering to turn off the lights when I leave the room and putting my dirty dish in the sink after dinner, good habits are the things that remain clearest and most automatic.
As Kylie is growing up, I'm going to strive to prevent myself from accidentally teaching her bad habits or letting her pick up on my bad habits. From baby habits to big kid habits like speaking before you think, I've done all the bad stuff and corrected most of it. No yelling or screaming or loud noises in the house, no complimenting her or encouraging it when she makes such noises, and never say swear words. As a high school student, I obviously have potty-mouthed friends. Whatever happens, they will not be the ones teaching my baby sister foul language. I think she'll have the power to resist it as a habit even once she does get to that age. I have faith in her.
More recently than the first exchange, another question came up between the two of us. "Where do you get your moral compass?" I'm a very non-religious person. In fact, I avoid religion almost at all costs. My family is not affiliated with any religions either. I, personally, am an advocate for LGBT rights, and would categorize myself as one who bases her ideas off of proof and science, not divine intervention. Freethinker. However, with a childhood education that sprouted in a college town in the Deep South, Christian influence was extremely prevalent until I was about eight. From ages eight to thirteen, last summer, we lived in a suburb of Atlanta, Georgia that had up to 6 churches on a major street. Where we live now, where Kylie is going to grow up, I've only counted 3 churches in the area total. Of course, my parents were stronger navigators of the moral compass than the community around us, it probably would be beneficial to have the extra reinforcement of the common sense kind of right or wrong within the community.
-Chichi
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